Chaotic Array

We're only two months into the year and I'm already dead. Cause of death: Tomb Raider DLC. Seriously, the new content looks amazing. I was always horrified of Baba Yaga as a kid because of this folklore book that I had with a story about her in it. I thought she would kidnap me and turn me into her personal slave or something, make me live with her in her creepy chicken/cottage.

GUYS! FRENZY IS OUT! In case you missed my previous post about it, Frenzy is a young adult urban fantasy novella with a diverse cast of characters, cute romance, and a healthy helping of paranormal beings, so in celebration of its release I thought I’d share some facts about the book; 1) It's Full of Monsters. From Harpies to Goblins, Faeries to Undine, Werewolves to Reapers, this first glimpse at the Menagerie world is. . .well, it’s a menagerie of paranormal creatures. What else could you want? 2) . . .& Lesbian Romance! Yup, it's an LGBT romance. Again, what else could you want? 3) The main character is a Gnome. I feel pretty good about this one, since I haven't seen anyone else doing it (yet!) and I love elementals. 4) It's Got Pop Culture References. . . Because we all know at this point that I can't write a book without them. 5) It's a standalone Novella! Which means it's short, sweet, and simple. The book works both on its own, or...

So, I've been working on this project as a little aside for a while that I haven't been able to talk about, but it looks like I'm going to finish revisions and move onto copy edits within the next two days, and be able to publish the book within the next two weeks. So I can finally announce it. And, because I'm just that cool, I'm going to reveal the cover at the same time, and give you all a bit of Souls of Salt & Seawater news! So, the cover: And a bit about the book: If the word Gnome conjures up images of tiny bearded statues hanging around on front lawns, then think again. . . Eighteen year-old Gnome Evelyn Torres isn't exactly having the day she planned. Sure, her skill and power as an earth elemental are at an all-time high. . .but her life is kind of a mess. Her online date turned out to be of the non-human variety. A man claiming to be the father she's never spoken to has suddenly reached out to her. Oh, and the icing on the ...

In defense of my father, Bigfoot could be real. Mind you, when I say "could" I mean it in the same way I do when I tell you that I *could* probably survive being shot. That I *could* become a bio-engineer someday. Which is to say, probably fucking not, but I like to keep a sense of wonder about me. Why am I bringing up Bigfoot? Well, because a Sasquatch probably could survive being shot, if one did exist. And because my dad is fucking obsessed with them for some reason. Seriously, I think I've been forced to sit through more history and science channel specials than a damn junior high teacher. My dad is like, the official unofficial Sasquatch expert. But this week the Bigfoot obsession has been kicked into overdrive - as in, while we're all sitting at the kitchen table eating dinner, he's got the iPad propped up beside his plate watching documentaries about the hunt for the Yeti. Yeah, welcome to my world. But the thing is, today, I had one of those Reese Wi...

I have no clue what happened in the last few days, but I really let some things slip. Work-wise, things have been fine. I'm making steady progress on . . . things (not all of which I can talk about yet) and feeling really inspired. But damn, my diet has been in flux. I was on a vegetarian diet for about nine or ten days, but I caved and ate some meatloaf one day and never really got back on that diet. I'll be starting that again tomorrow, and I'm not really worried about maintaining it, just angry I let it slip in the first place. I've been trying to focus on my health - both mental and physical - this year, and while I feel like it's been a success so far, I also feel like I could be doing more. I guess the point is I always feel like I could be doing more, even when I'm already doing a lot. But recently I started doing a lot less, since I was stressing out about, well, everyone. Kuma came out for a few days to hang out and I let myself slack off then, to...

I know I'm not the only one doing this. You have like twenty-three unread books on your shelves, waiting for you to pick them up. You have a stack of books you're in the middle of on your nightstand the size of your head. And yet, you go to four bookstores in a day. . . You buy a bunch of books, even though you have zero time to read and a million other books to get to first. It doesn't matter though because pretty spines and pages and ugh, books. I finally have Emerald Green and The Rising - now the Gathering trilogy and the Ruby Red trilogy are complete on my shelves. I've already read Hex Hall and The Darkest Part of the Forest, but I wanted my own copies. . . I've also heard really good things about Die For me. The notebook is one of those fancy ones with metal clasps and pretty textured pages that you get at chain bookstores. I actually just bought a new sketchbook a few weeks ago, so I'm using this one as a journal. And yeah, I went to fo...

A lesson that I've already learned but that the world seems determined to remind me of today, is that the world is filled with people who will take one look at you and assume they know the whole story. There are people who are determined to misunderstand or mishear you, and it doesn't matter what you say or how you say it, because they've already made up their minds about you and who they think you are based off of a single encounter, or a first impression, or a misread statement. There are people who will belittle and dehumanize you because your voice is scary to them or because they don't like what you're saying. There are a million reasons people, especially strangers, will use to be cruel. Because it's easy to be cruel. It's hard to be kind. And yet- There are people out there who will take the hard road. Who will, even knowing that it will be a steep climb and a cold journey, still take the time to learn your soul. People who will grab onto you an...

I spent most of the day wasting my damn time. I don't know how I let myself waste like, 4 whole hours lying around, but I did. I got a drive down to the gas station early in the morning to buy a bunch of snacks, but had to walk back. Still, I figured if I'm going veggie, I deserve some damn salsa. . . that didn't make the forty minute walk home through the snow any more fun, though. By the time I got home I was basically coated in a layer of ice. Okay, not actually - but I might as well have been. Also, it was a creepy walk. Not only is it just generally spooky to be walking through a road in the middle of the woods, it's even worse to do it while crows fly around above you, cawing and staring. Crows are creepy birds. I mean, cute, but kind of demonic. My parents bought pizza tonight and actually remembered to get me a vegetarian one, which was really nice of them - and it's fucking perfect: You wish you had this pizza. . . Aside from that I'm j...

So. The vegetarian thing is still going. I'm losing bits of my sanity every time someone in the house cooks meat, but I haven't cracked yet. I woke up at twelve am and it's four in the morning now, so I should start working for a while, because I have a bunch of homework to do today as well, and I want to get my daily editing out of the way. But first I have to go make something to eat. Something meatless. Ugh.

A List: Random racist people popping up in my Tumblr inbox to tell me they should get away with saying blatantly anti-Native stuff. My brother coming home with little to no warning. (I like my brother: I like him better from a distance.) My Mom cooking Chicken and then doing her best to convince me to eat it even though I told her before I took a nap this morning that I was going vegetarian. My jaw randomly hurting every time I open or close my mouth. Poverty. Sobriety. The world, maybe? I don't know. As you can see, I'm agitated as hell tonight. I think I might punch somebody. I feel a lot better than I did before sleeping, at least, but I'm still generally pissed at the world. That was my mental illness acting up. This is actual, rational emotion. So I don't know why the things that annoy me decided to collaborate and make this the day I go to the pen, but they did. I'm going to focus on working on SOSAS and lock myself in my room so I don...

Things take time. I know that. It takes hard work and it takes patience. I'm not good at patience. I keep having to remind myself, Rome wasn't built in a day, but it really doesn't help. I want these things to be done, I want Shadows and SOSAS to be done and out, and I want other projects I'm working on to be done and out. I want to be able to share these things and talk more about them because I can't because I'm not ready to release them yet or because they're in the early stages and everything is subject to change. . . And it's mornings like this, when I've already been up all night working and I'm still not done and I still feel like I haven't done enough, when I'm on coffee number who-knows and my brain is fried and my fingers shake even when I hold my hands still, that I feel that the most. I have this urge, this restless energy beneath my skin that turns me frantic and won't let me sleep. I have to resist the urge to keep...

I don't know if this feature will stick (if it does it probably will be monthly as opposed to weekly in the future) but I'm thinking I'll start linking reviews here. My book review blog on Tumblr is  http://golden-tomes.tumblr.com/  (an aside: I'll be adding a 'where can you find me?' type page to this blog soon to make finding me elsewhere easier) but it takes me a while to cross post reviews there, so instead I'll link them here first. So, without further ado, here are the books I finished this week, along with links to their reviews :   Gilded Review: https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/602433525   Say You're Mine  Review: https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/1489792540   Darkness Falls  Review: https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/726088599   Storm  Review: https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/736041826

My goals for today are this: Finish an assignment. Finish a round of edits. Finish reading Storm by Amanda Sun. Here's the thing: I love the Paper God's trilogy. I love Amanda Sun's writing. I do not love doing things that aren't writing or browsing the internet. I have such a lack of motivation lately it's not even funny: and it's not that I'm not excited about my goals or I don't wanna accomplish things. It's just that my bed is super comfy and it's a lot more fun to sit under the covers and get stoned and browse the web and listen to pop music than it is to sit down and actually get some work done. But I love this series and characters, and I need to be ready to read Heir to the Sky, so I'm going to just sit down today and read this damn book. If I don't finish it, that's fine, but I only have a third of the book left, so it doesn't feel like too much. So those are my goals today, and if I don't accomplish ...

🌙🌙🌙 Shadowhunters doesn't premier until the twelfth, and that is killing me. I keep seeing these fantastic edits and screen shots and promo pics on Tumblr, and I have no idea how other fans are getting these/where they're finding them, but they're just making me more anxious to watch. And then when I do get to watch, I'll only get the one episode, and then I'll be waiting another week. This show might kill me. Hell, waiting the last few days for it might kill me. Rereading the books would certainly kill me, so I won't even go near those. (God knows if I crack open City of Bones one more time, that paperback is gonna snap in half or something.) So I'll keep drinking my hot chocolate and minding my own damn business. Kuma is going home later today, so until then we're sitting around on the internet. Once she leaves, I'll probably stay up and get work done. I haven't done much while she's been here, aside from finishing up the new ed...

It's been months since Emotion came out and I'm still jamming the hell out to it non-stop . . . I love Carly Rae Jepsen because she's the only Canadian pop star who's still relevant without being a douche. I mean, Avril Lavigne is . . . is she even still making music, after the nightmare that was Hello Kitty? And Justin Bieber has been pumping out jam after jam, sure, but he's kind of an ass. Carly is the only one who's still talented and not being an awful human being (although I guess Justin's been cleaning his act up lately . . . ) The point is, I love this album, and you should too. Kuma and I have been blasting it all morning. My parents are coming home from a trip to see my aunt today, and we're waiting for them, cleaning, and drinking (yes, at 1 in the afternoon - it's as disgusting as it sounds) and generally having a good time. Being the wonderful human being I am, I just wanted to post some of these songs in case some of you hadn'...

So. Remember how I said I was working on a revised edition of Things We Saw at Midnight a few days ago? And then again earlier today? And remember how I said it was killing me? Well it isn't anymore BECAUSE IT'S DONE AND I PUBLISHED IT! It might take a while to go through on Amazon, and I'm not updating the Wattpad edition until tomorrow, it's ready to read immediately on Smashwords for free:  https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/584827 And it's also got a new cover: Like it? This is going to be the cover for the paperback edition, too, which is coming soon! I'll be having a few giveaways of it eventually, too, so keep your eyes peeled. In the meantime you can grab a free copy for your ereader and enjoy the scares!

2016 is about editing, clearly. Because it seems like that's all I do now: wake up, coffee, edit book, coffee, edit book, coffee, edit book, sleep, coffee, edit book. Because I'm actually editing two books. Okay, okay, I know, I said one at a time the other day. And I'm still sticking to that rule, and that book is still Sosas, and everything is on track. But I'm also doing a bit of editing on Things We Saw at Midnight every day for this revised edition, which is actually moving along. I was right about it being mostly copy-editing, but one fun thing I did is get a new cover. It's not too different. In fact, it uses the same stock image and font - but it's definitely my favourite over the old design. I won't be sharing until I've already hit published on the revised book (which should be sometime within the next five days, I'll post about it when it's done!) but I can't wait to share it, because it's like candy for the eyes. I...

I've been listening to a lot of Lana Del Rey lately. I mean, I always listen to a lot of Lana Del Rey, but I've largely been ignoring the existence of Music To Watch Boys To so now I'm making up for it by watching it on repeat. To be clear, I think Lana Del Rey has really racist tendencies towards First Nations people and Mexicans, and needs a damn wake up call, but problematic tendencies aside, her music is fucking incredible. Aside from that I've been working a bunch - but not as much as I could have, because it was Christmas, and then New Years, and a lot of crazy stuff happened, and it didn't leave much time for writing. . . Mostly, I've been taking selfies. Wouldn't you, though, if you had these eyebrows? Okay, I swear I'm not actually this vain (or am I?) but I'm trying to write more blog posts this year, and catalogue more memories, and photos count as memories. I'm actually kind of obsessed with taking photos of things, be the...