Fallen Angels and Random Pitfalls: An Update

Once in a while things get very overwhelming and I tend to shut down and focus on the bare minimum tasks I feel are most important, and one of the things that falls by the wayside is this blog which very few of my readers actually keep up with - on the one hand, it means a lot of people don't actually read this information, but on the other, it means I get to post as many of my insane rantings and ravings as I like without being chased down with torches and pitchforks, and I'm okay with that.

That said, last time I posted a blog here it was NaNoWriMo, and I was very much looking forward to writing my sci-fi book The First Instinct. But since then plans have changed. I switched novels during NaNo to a paranormal romance called Sharp Hollows, but right now that's taken a backseat too. Mainly because NaNoWriMo was a total bust.

Also because I decided I should probably edit and release some other things before I start working on brand new full-length novels. For example, my short story Be Not Afraid!

Be Not Afraid was written, like, last November or December. It's a year old, and I'm kicking myself for not editing and releasing it sooner. I wrote two angel/demon themed short stories back to back, and this is one of them. You can find its Goodreads Page here. It's a very anime vibe coming from me, which I had fun with. It's got a giant spooky monster, a cool epic fight scene, and it feels very episodic/monster of the week, even though it's a standalone. At least for now.

Here's the cover:

I also added a page for it here on the blog. It will be up on Wattpad for free and maybe on this blog too, on it's official book/title page. I am looking to put out a couple more free stories in the coming weeks just because I have two or three I think would be really suited to it, and since right now I can't publish on certain retailers before the New Year (I've gotta get some new documents, rectify all my information on all my accounts, set up accounts with new distributors, etc) I might as well share things the only way I can.

Be Not Afraid, Digital Demon, and CerbIm: Blackout are the stories I'm thinking will be free, but for now keep an eye peeled for an update post where I share Be Not Afraid with official links and stuff.

I had a computer problem the other night and had to reset my PC and while I was doing so I decided I should upgrade to the new version of Scrivener because I was stuck on an outdated one. Scrivener 3 is amazing so far. I'm just hoping my payment actually goes through (it's still processing, and it should be fine, but these things make me nervous, lol) but so far I'm having fun exploring it! Even the thumbnail/taskbar icon is prettier.

In any news I'm spending Christmas morning editing this story and getting it ready, while I drink a little too much vodka, so I wanted to share the cover, aesthetic board, and some more news. I'm sure I've mentioned Be Not Afraid on this blog before, but it felt only proper to give it a real, focused introduction.

I hope your writing and reading goals are all successful and fun this holiday season! Much love, and Merry Xmas from me and mine. :)

 

Maybe You're My Enemy, You're The Only One Who Knows The Way I Really Feel

Title from Enemy by Charli XCX.

I'm pretty sure this blog is dead but that won't stop me from writing updates for it. In fact, I actually find it kind of comforting that very few people, if any, read my insane ramblings here. I'm almost done my next book, and I have a couple finished and semi-finished things I've been sitting on for a long time now, or at least what feels like a long time; I think the oldest of them dates back to November or so.

I have to edit a novella tonight and I'm having a nervous breakdown about it, so instead of actually doing it I thought I'd come complain about how long it's taking Rise of The Tomb Raider (a game that came out like five years ago while I was still working at Bath and Body Works, lol) to get here. I ordered it way too long ago. I can't really complain though because there's a pandemic and all, and the truth is it's amazing we can even still order stuff at all with all the craziness going on.

Since everybody is laid-off right now, I don't have the house to myself and everyone I live with is driving me insane. They're not really doing anything annoying, I just can't focus or think when people are around. Luckily, they go to bed weirdly early, and I can be the only one awake all night, and actually experience the silence and peace I need to work. Some people party all night - I just get around to doing the chores and work I should've done during the day, because I'm amazingly efficient and productive and on top of things. Yup. :)

My main problem in life right now is that the main character of the most recent book I wrote/am writing is Sam, and a major male character in the Superhero High stories is also named Sam, and I don't want to change either of them because it fits them both in different ways. It's fine, or at least I think it's fine, since plenty of people IRL have the same name, God knows there's a million men named Kai out there, but still, I don't like reusing them.

I think if Sam from the First War series met Sam from the Superhero High series, they'd either ignore each other entirely, or they'd build a bomb together. I don't think they'd be friends, (mainly because First War Sam is a college student who doesn't hang around with high school freshman) but they'd definitely team up in a pinch to pull of a con or an escape act.

Anyway that's what's been going on in my corner: intense internal debates about character naming choices. I also spent the better half of the day trying to catch a tiny mouse before my cats did so I could free it outside. Eventually got the little buddy safely out of the house and away from Angus and Cami and their little hunting party fantasy. I don't think either of them were happy I spared their prey, but I feel pretty happy for defying fate and sparing the mouse. He'll probably be eaten by an owl or a hawk before the night is through, but hey, maybe not. Maybe he's the Chosen One of the mouse world and he's off to fulfill a prophecy. Really none of my business, is it?

I also beat inFamous Second Son and Horizon Zero Dawn and I'm kind of emotional over both. The fact that they don't seem to be planning anymore inFamous games is a literal fucking crime. I guess four should be enough, but it's not. I'd love to see Cole come back, or another Delsin game, or a Eugene game, or something with new conduits. I don't care. I still have to finish my replay of inFamous 2 and play Festival of Blood for the first time, but then I'm done with the series and I'm kind of not ready for that. I don't want any other superhero games, these are the only ones that matter honestly. (Although I guess the jumping/leaping powers in Saints Row 4 were pretty fun.)

So pretty much all I've been up to is writing and gaming and writing and gaming and editing and sleeping. And gaming.

I'll probably stay doing that, since nobody is allowed to leave the house. :L

If you want to keep up with what I do you can find me on Insta at @ApolloBlakeBooks or check out my latest release, a short story called Faces in Weeds! It's about a girl who commits a murder and her attempts to cover it up/splintering mental state.

In The Belly of The Voodoo Machine

Title from Hades Pleads by Parker Millsap...

I'm staying in bed all day today in order to edit Dreamseeker and try to draft (or mostly draft) book 2, Dreamsinger. I think it will be good to take a break from my current novel WIP today and draft a novella, plus I've wanted to update the front- and back-matter of book 1 for a long while!

Book 2 is a rock star romance AND it has a human protagonist who serves in a damsel distress role a lot, so it's a lot different than book 1 and it will be a lot of fun to write. I still have to finish glossing over book 1, though, and I'm dragging my feet.

I've already had way too much coffee and tea today and I've been pigging out on potato scallop and baked ham. I played a little Fallout earlier and I'll probably play more tonight, but for now I'm cooped up in my room avoiding writing to blog. I also really want to read a lot today, but I can't let myself be sucked into some good book before I work on some of my own. My output for the last week has been shameful and I have to wrangle February back on track, productivity-wise.

Lately I started binging The Good Place and it's hilarious, but it's also made me cry a couple times. Definitely an amazing show. I already knew the season 1 plot twist before I went in and I still enjoyed it immensely as I saw it pulled off. I highly recommend it! I love afterlife stories so I wish I had started it sooner, but I saw a bunch of people in the BoJack subreddit ranting and raving about it during the BoJack finale threads (because they used similar plot devices but in opposite ways) and I had BoJack hangover from that shotgun blast of an ending to what is probably the best show ever, so I started The Good Place to help distract me a little...

Now I really am going to stop ranting and raving about TV shows and stuff and go write my damn book. Because I am a capable author who promised himself he'd make 2020 his bitch...

But There Are Good Days Too

Last night I complained about marketing being too much work. I complained about writing being hard. I wrung my hands in frustration because every word I put on the page felt like I was stepping in mud, and it was weighing me down, and I'd never be able to finish another book.


Then, I took a break. Counted to five. Opened my wip. And I wrote 6000 words, almost without stopping.


There are good days.


You can power through writers block.


It just takes a lot of willpower. And lots of coffee. And maybe the chapter you put down isn't your best, but it has something special to it, some little flair you love, that's keeping you excited for when the time to edit comes. Sometimes that can be enough.


Rewards are little things when you write all day. We work alone. It's stressful, and tiring, and sometimes the best feeling in the world is knowing you hit the 6k mark, and that tomorrow might be a little easier.

Airships & Ice Plains

Tonight I get to start writing the new edition of Iceblood! Wait, another one? Kinda.

The last 'new edition' of Iceblood I put out was actually just Iceblood as a standalone. It was the same edition of the story published in Souls of Salt & Seawater, just available as a solo.

This is an expanded version with new scenes and chapters, more romance, more fighting, and...airships!

Obviously, I'm a little excited.

The reason I'm writing this is because while I originally intended for the sequel, Anarchy, to be about new characters in a new situation, when I sat down to write it, nothing would come out. It just wasn't a story I was interested in writing. I wanted to continue Atka's.

So now that this is an actual series - as in both books are about Atka and are from her pov, and you have to read them both for the complete experience, some things about the first book need to change.

First of all I'm publishing the new edition under my Cosmo Knox pen name, which should be enough to tell you it's gonna be a bit more mature - more killing, more steamy romance scenes, et-cet... But also, I wanted it to resemble more of a complete fulfilling story than just 'two street criminals rob a mansion together' - and this version is going to deliver that by raising the stakes and widening the scope of the story.

I love fantasy, and I put a lot of work into this world, so I figure I should use it.

I'm also going to be publishing Beacon sometime in the next two days, and I'll post links when it goes up! Until then I updated the series tab for that at the top of the blog, and added a tiny blurb for book two, Shine!

This post is a cop-out

I don't have a real post to share with you guys tonight. It's 5 in the morning and I have to leave the house in a few hours to pick up Kuma, which means that once we get back I won't really have time to write again today, meaning I have to draft at least 3000 words in 2 hours after I finish posting this blog, if I want to stay on schedule with this short story, which is set in a hotel and has monsters and a hot rock star boy.

I just felt bad not posting here, since I want to be more active on this blog. I don't think many people read it, either because I post at odd times, I'm bad at tagging/sharing things, and because author blogs are everywhere and I'm hardly famous, or even have a halfway decent following - but that will probably change if I'm more active and persistent, so, here we are.

I also just like looking back at all my blog posts and feeling productive, knowing I have those memories no matter what, and also knowing that there's something for people to read while waiting for books or if they want information on the process a specific book went through during its writing.

My birthday is in a few days, on the 22nd, and since I'll probably spend the day right here at my desk, alone, working, and may not even notice the date other than a cursory "Ha, I'm old now" (I'm turning 21 so I'm lying to myself, but still) Kuma figured they'd come out and celebrate with me now, while we have the chance.

My 20th birthday was miserable - I spent most of it sitting in the same place/position I'm in now, except instead of blogging or writing, I cried over my finances, got high and watched broad city, called the bank and SOBBED over my finances, then ate some bad pizza and watched more Broad City. If that sounds like a miserable twentieth birthday, it was, both because I was going through so much financial stress and also because I was snowed in so I couldn't go anywhere and it honestly felt like winter would never be over, and isn't March supposed to be in the spring?

I had to call the bank lady and she noticed my account listed my birthday as that day, and kept asking me questions about my plans, which made me both depressed and embarrassed because I didn't have any, wasn't doing anything or hanging out with anybody, and only 3 people remembered it was my birthday anyway, so after lying through my teeth and hanging up the phone I sat there and cried for like 20 minutes, and then got stoned. This year I'm pretty sure I'm even worse-off financially than I was then and for some reason I'm unphased by it now?

Maybe I just don't have the energy, or maybe over the past year I've just stopped worrying about my money troubles as much. I think it's a bit of both. In full disclosure I've made like 14 dollars off of my books in the last 90 days, according to kdp, which is really mortifying to admit, but also not, because I know it isn't a reflection of the quality of my work.

My books are good. They're entertaining. I'm writing the same stuff popular authors like Laini Taylor and A.G. Howard are writing, with more diverse characters and some really pretty covers that I know for a fact stand up to the covers of traditionally published books and are, in some cases, even better looking than those. But I also know I have zero marketing budget, not to mention that I am the only person marketing my books, with no outside help, and I know that there are so many books being published right now it's hard to find a number to describe them all. Many people only read one book a year - that's a lot of competition.

If I had to choose one thing about my books I'd like to improve, it would be the formatting. I'm not even sure how it displays on other devices - I know it looks fine on mine, or as fine as I can make it, but who knows?

If I ever take off and start making real money I'm going to buy a Macbook so I can get Vellum and make them pretty, with chapter heading illustrations and stuff like that, which I can't do alone using Kingsoft Writer and Calibre, which are my formatting tools.

So yeah, that's that. Things are looking up (slightly) emotionally but looking down financially, and I want that to change.

I don't want to get rich off of my books. For the next few years I just want to earn enough to buy a new laptop, buy Grammerly, get some new headphones, and maybe a new desk. Just spending money that I can put back into my books and career, you know? Within ten years I do want to be living entirely off my books though, and considering how fast I can write them once I get down to it, I don't think that's so unrealistic.

So, we'll see. First I have to survive this birthday, and everything else will follow from there, right?

Anyway, I'm going to go and draft this short story, pick up my best friend, and then scream my way through another episode of Riverdale, which I will officially boycott if they don't give me AroAce Jughead and more Cheryl-centric episodes, because we all know Cheryl is the show's saving grace/

Too Much and Too Little

While going over SOSAS another time I've been listening to The Walk, by Imogen Heap, on repeat. I've also been stuffing my face with barbecue chips.

But I thought I would take a break from that to post a quote from the book really quickly:

You can buy the book here, or just wait until it's out in paperback. The new edition will have a map of the world in it. If I can figure out how to format that.

Or, you can request a free review copy by sending me an email, which I talked about in my last post. The gist of it is this: you like free books, I like honest reviews. And giving out free books.

So shoot me an email at ApolloBlake@mail.com for a free ebook if you're interested. Now, back to work!