Can I Cook or Not?

Today I got in a huge fight with my parents, and now my head is pounding. My best friend Kuma cheered me up a bit and comforted me, because they're awesome. And I've been listening to all the good new pop music to make myself feel better. Olivia O'Brien's new album is crazy. I also like the new Ashnikko song, and of course, Taylor Swift finally dropped her new single. I didn't like it at first but it's growing on me. She always picks bad lead singles anyway, then her albums have amazing deep cuts.

I made some beats in BandLab tonight that I really enjoy. I made like six songs and of those I think four have potential, so I wrote some lyrics for those to record later today once the sun is up and I'm home alone.

I want to move out really bad but I'm not sure I want to leave the country, I'm kind of too used to it even though it's inconvenient and spooky sometimes. I think cities are scarier because of inevitable societal collapse. I mean, I say inevitable, but I hope it's not, but all the climate change news and deforestation freaks me out. But if I lived in the city my neighbours would hear me singing, and that's awkward. Even though I do post some of my songs online, it's the final versions that I think sound decent enough to share. And even now I look back on many of those songs and cringe. But I still feel a compulsive need to make them, even if I'm too shy to sing when other people are around. Basically everything I do is a random compulsion though, so that's that.

I have a short story in the works I really don't want to finish. I'm just not in the mood to write more erotica tonight, but if I don't finish now I don't know if I ever will. (Note: since writing this I finished it. It was easy and fun, I was just being a drama queen.)

All I want to work on is the sequel to Storm of Masks. I have so many ideas for it and I feel genuinely inspired, but I have other things on my checklist first. To satiate myself I'll republish Storm of Masks sometime soon, since it's down right now. I'm very excited for these sequels. Each one ramps things up a step further, to crazy levels. I've got a few things to finish first though, and right now all I want to do is go play video games and be lazy.

First I'm going to eat more baked potatoes and salad though, because that's the only thing in the world I want right now. I don't know why I have such intense cravings for baked potatoes lately. It's probably that weird Tierra Whack music video for her song Unemployed. I just love the texture of the skins I think, they're super crispy and I drench them in butter and salt and pepper. Plus they're simple to cook and require like 3 tiny steps. If I have to put in effort in a dish I'm either going to burn it or ruin it some other way.

I disagree with my parents on a lot of things but they have finally convinced me I can't cook, so there's that, but I can make baked potatoes, and salad, and that's good enough for me.

Actually since I said that I cooked some honey garlic chicken and rice that my mom said looked good, and she told my brother I'm an awesome cook. So I think she's as indecisive as me. Maybe it depends on the day. I do burn stuff a lot but it's usually because I get stoned and forget I turned the oven on.