Chaotic Array

Once in a while things get very overwhelming and I tend to shut down and focus on the bare minimum tasks I feel are most important, and one of the things that falls by the wayside is this blog which very few of my readers actually keep up with - on the one hand, it means a lot of people don't actually read this information, but on the other, it means I get to post as many of my insane rantings and ravings as I like without being chased down with torches and pitchforks, and I'm okay with that. That said, last time I posted a blog here it was NaNoWriMo, and I was very much looking forward to writing my sci-fi book The First Instinct. But since then plans have changed. I switched novels during NaNo to a paranormal romance called Sharp Hollows, but right now that's taken a backseat too. Mainly because NaNoWriMo was a total bust. Also because I decided I should probably edit and release some other things before I start working on brand new full-length novels. For example, my sho...

 Finally. FINALLY. It is November. I'm not going to lie, I had no idea whether or not I was going to participate in NaNoWriMo this year, but of course, here I am. It seems I can't resist the siren song of a fresh, shiny new idea. And NaNoWriMo always makes me nostalgic. It's comforting and familiar and nostalgic and honestly just what I need right now. I haven't written in weeks and I can't keep trying to force myself to edit with no results, so my approach needs to change. I'm hoping that enjoying a familiar, fun writing challenge and writing a new standalone this month will help me get out of this weird personal funk I've been in and help with my recent bout of stubborn writer's block. In this case writer's block is kind of code for 'heavy depressive episode' but that's just life. Weirdly enough everyone I know is dreading late fall and winter because of seasonal depression but I like early winter when it all feels fresh and clean and e...

  It's been a long, weird summer, and I almost forgot it was summer at all until the other day the realization came to me that I haven't been swimming at all. I don't think I went swimming last summer either. It used to be my favorite part of the season. And now fall is right around the corner. But life gets in the way of simple things sometimes. It's been a hell of a last few months. The other day the YouTube algorithm spat this song at me: Crush by Ethel Cain. I think it might be one of the best things I've heard in my whole life. It's been on repeat for that reason alone, but the music video itself is also really good. I just can't get it out of my head. Something's been feeling weird lately, there's just something about you baby, maybe I'll just be crazy, and piss him off 'till he hates me... Writing has been sort of happening? But not as much or as often as I like. I began editing the first of two short stories in a series which I have ...

  Review Banner for a reading goal of mine this year :) 

 Just a nice aesthetic I made for my new romance novella, which is free to read on Wattpad:  https://www.wattpad.com/story/257106440-at-the-alcatraz-caf%C3%A9

  We finally got a Lara Croft skin in Fortnite and I. AM. LIVING. I can't help but hope the fact that they gave us Classic Lara isn't just a way to appease fans and they're going to go back to a more original look for her in the next game. I don't know why the character models for Lara looked so good in the 2013 game and in Rise, and then in Shadow of the Tomb Raider they did her so dirty and made her look like a potato. Lara does not look like that and poor, beautiful Camilla Ludington does not look like that. She earned a better character model to go with her performance. Plus they tried to give us an outfit in that game with the OG turquoise coloring which was a nice idea but it had poor execution. It was kind of fugly. Also the fact that they gave us a classic Lara model but kept the breast size reduction from more recent games is nice; it proves she can look good in that outfit even with the changes and I hope it triggered those fanboys who whine about her and Tifa...

  Oh look, it's another instalment in the endless saga of theme changes this blog has been through!  Well don't worry, folks. I think this one is here to stay! I really enjoy it. I've neglected this blog for far too long because: 1) I figured Blogger was dying (and it kind of is, I guess, but I don't care anymore). 2) I figured nobody was reading it (which isn't totally true, but it wouldn't be a big deal if it was). 3) I am very intimidated by picking out a blog theme. It's hard. I've seen people call blogs just like mine ugly and clunky, but I don't care. This design/theme makes me nostalgic for a ton of other author blogs I used to follow. Now I've just accepted this is what my blog looks like and this is what I want  it to look like. It's nostalgic. It's retro. It's...very, like, 2009-2011 YA author vibes, and you know what? That's when I was in middle school dreaming of being an author, and the paranormal romance trend was at...